So OK - I've been out of sports writing for what seems like forever but as baseball season nears (both for the Red Sox and my son's Little League season), I have volunteered to write "game summaries" for my son's team and I have to say I am getting pretty damned excited.
I used to cover Little League baseball and to tell you the truth, I genuinely enjoyed my beat. The kids clamored to talk to the "reporter" and many times, I was invited to sit in the dugout. To those 9 and 10 year olds, I was ancient at 28 years old. But I never ran out of my supply of quotes because those kids never ran out of things to say.
Field of Dreams hadn't been made back in those days and neither had The Rookie or A League of Their Own. I dreamed of growing up and becoming a baseball player - I never wanted to be anything else. Barbie dolls? Ha - they were used for batting practice (heads on, of course). Girly frilly lacy dresses? Yuck. Bring me my dirty sneakers and my glove. Of course my father shot down all my dreams when he had the audacity to tell me that girls couldn't play baseball. So I figured the next best thing to playing (and staying as close to the sport as possible) was writing about the game.
I started writing when I was about 11 years old. I'd watch the Red Sox games and write my own stories. I had a paper route and I knew the driver of my route truck wrote sports stories for the newspaper. So I showed him my stuff, and he showed my stories to the sports editor and when I went to high school, I already had a job: Five bucks a story covering my high school sports.
The girls hated my guts because I hung around their boyfriends solely because they were always talking to me to try and secure their place in my game stories.
I loved my job, I loved being able to write but most of all, I loved it when a kid I wrote about went on to become a successful athlete or coach. It was kinda cool saying "hey, I knew him when ..."
My son wants to work at NASA someday. Sure, when I found out I was having a boy 10 years ago, all I could think of was that maybe someday he'd bring me home a REAL World Series ring and of course, I'd set the rules early: He could NOT play for the New York Yankees because that would be - heavens - sacrilegious!!!!
But as my son got older, the stars, the planets, the universe and the Hubble Telescope held his interest. Baseball became fun to him and actually, I don't mind.
Because maybe someday my son will grow up and be the first person to land on the moon and toss a baseball. Or something.
Whatever he ends up doing, baseball will always have been a part of both of our lives. But for now, it's just the AAA Rays starting their season soon and my son will be a part of that team.
And I get to write about baseball again.
Doesn't get any better than that.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Bullying - Is this ever going to end?
Recently, I posted a blog about bullying, particularly in response to the suicide of Phoebe Prince, a South Hadley HS teen who hanged herself to escape the relentless torment of the "mean girls" who bullied her all because she was (a) new to the school; (b) a freshman who dated a senior; and a host of other reasons. My blog was centered on how "words" were used as "weapons" by the "mean girls" and how Phoebe was tired of walking around with holes in her soul, her life blood ebbing away - mostly likely caused by the caches of weapons these girls used on Phoebe day in and day out. Weapons in the form of words.
An article dated January 24, 2010 on boston.com entitled "The Untouchable Mean Girls" documented the details that led up to Phoebe's death, and how the "mean girls" actually believed they were not responsible for Phoebe's death. According to the article, one South Hadley teen who was interviewed was physically slammed into a locker by one of these "mean girls" because she "talked."
But perhaps the worst torment, the extra twist of the knife came AFTER Phoebe's death - these very same "mean girls" still continued to slam Phoebe Prince and mocked her, still referred to her as a "slut" on social networking sites - AFTER SHE WAS DEAD. Weapons in the form of words. A memorial page was created on Facebook in memory of Phoebe and these horrible excuses for human beings - these "mean girls" attacked Phoebe on this memorial page. Weapons in the form of words.
On Wednesday, I received an email from a mother who responded to my recent blog. She questioned my use of adjectives (words) of these "mean girls" -- and all bullies for that matter - I referred to these "mean girls" as devoid of emotion, soulless and pond scum. Aren't they? These girls were responsible for Phoebe Prince's suicide. The mother wrote to me " when you call these bullies horrible soulless shallow devoid of emotion pond scum" she asked me if I wasn't using my words as weapons. She asked me if my use of these adjectives was okay because the bullies are "guilty" and Phoebe Prince is "innocent." And she put guilty and innocent in quotes, leading me to believe that she was inferring that perhaps Phoebe Prince wasn't so innocent. I find that extremely difficult to believe because Phoebe Prince is dead and the "mean girls" were expelled from school and probably have moved on to another target.
Whatever her inference was, I stand by what I wrote about these "mean girls" and ALL mean girls who bully and torment others for reasons that are just unfathomable.
My weaponry of words in my last blog didn't cause Phoebe Prince's suicide and my weaponry of adjectives accurately describes these "mean girls" who drove a teenager to her death because they lacked a soul, they lacked depth and they lacked emotion. And of course pond scum is as low as you can go - didn't these mean girls go as low as they can do with their relentless torment of Phoebe Prince? Is is possible that IF those very same mean girls possessed the ordinary, good, decent traits of human beings that Phoebe Prince may still be alive?
And my "weaponry" of words certainly isn't going to be read by these means girls and even if they did read my post, they certainly are not going to care. Because to this day, these girls remain "defiant" and "unscathed." They do not care they drove a young girl to her death. And these very same mean girls are going to continue to purport their viciousness, meanness and soullessness upon anyone who crosses them.
And guess what? The parents of those mean girls? They could care less, too. I'm sure they're thinking "oh, MY daughter wouldn't do something like that." Well, your daughters DID do something like that and they have no remorse whatsoever as evident by their actions and weaponry of words used AFTER Phoebe's death.
And to the mother who responded to my use of adjectives that, in my opinion and the opinions of many others, accurately describes these "mean girls" -- just where do you think those girls learned how to use their cache of word weapons to drive a young girl to death?
Their parents.
Our children model our own behavior, speak our own words, mirror our actions, our anything. Whether our children turn what they learn from positive to negative is beyond our control.
But teaching our children that words ARE used as weapons if used improperly - it has to start with us. With the continuing advancement of technology that gives these bullies more and more opportunity to hone their vocabularly and the ability to use their "weapons in the form of words" and the very fact that they instill fear into those who cross them, it is up to the parents to take them down and take away their caches. It has to start with the parents.
And until the "mean girls" and all the bullies are held accountable for their actions by the very people who gave them life on this Earth, and by the school officials who dance circles around their own anti-bullying creeds which are mere words typed onto pieces of paper that lack barracuda teeth, kids like Phoebe Prince are going to continue to be tormented and bullied for no reason other than they take up space in the halls where the "mean girls" walk and consider their domain - and end up taking their own lives because in their devastated minds, death is far better than being destroyed by weapons in the form of words.
An article dated January 24, 2010 on boston.com entitled "The Untouchable Mean Girls" documented the details that led up to Phoebe's death, and how the "mean girls" actually believed they were not responsible for Phoebe's death. According to the article, one South Hadley teen who was interviewed was physically slammed into a locker by one of these "mean girls" because she "talked."
But perhaps the worst torment, the extra twist of the knife came AFTER Phoebe's death - these very same "mean girls" still continued to slam Phoebe Prince and mocked her, still referred to her as a "slut" on social networking sites - AFTER SHE WAS DEAD. Weapons in the form of words. A memorial page was created on Facebook in memory of Phoebe and these horrible excuses for human beings - these "mean girls" attacked Phoebe on this memorial page. Weapons in the form of words.
On Wednesday, I received an email from a mother who responded to my recent blog. She questioned my use of adjectives (words) of these "mean girls" -- and all bullies for that matter - I referred to these "mean girls" as devoid of emotion, soulless and pond scum. Aren't they? These girls were responsible for Phoebe Prince's suicide. The mother wrote to me " when you call these bullies horrible soulless shallow devoid of emotion pond scum" she asked me if I wasn't using my words as weapons. She asked me if my use of these adjectives was okay because the bullies are "guilty" and Phoebe Prince is "innocent." And she put guilty and innocent in quotes, leading me to believe that she was inferring that perhaps Phoebe Prince wasn't so innocent. I find that extremely difficult to believe because Phoebe Prince is dead and the "mean girls" were expelled from school and probably have moved on to another target.
Whatever her inference was, I stand by what I wrote about these "mean girls" and ALL mean girls who bully and torment others for reasons that are just unfathomable.
My weaponry of words in my last blog didn't cause Phoebe Prince's suicide and my weaponry of adjectives accurately describes these "mean girls" who drove a teenager to her death because they lacked a soul, they lacked depth and they lacked emotion. And of course pond scum is as low as you can go - didn't these mean girls go as low as they can do with their relentless torment of Phoebe Prince? Is is possible that IF those very same mean girls possessed the ordinary, good, decent traits of human beings that Phoebe Prince may still be alive?
And my "weaponry" of words certainly isn't going to be read by these means girls and even if they did read my post, they certainly are not going to care. Because to this day, these girls remain "defiant" and "unscathed." They do not care they drove a young girl to her death. And these very same mean girls are going to continue to purport their viciousness, meanness and soullessness upon anyone who crosses them.
And guess what? The parents of those mean girls? They could care less, too. I'm sure they're thinking "oh, MY daughter wouldn't do something like that." Well, your daughters DID do something like that and they have no remorse whatsoever as evident by their actions and weaponry of words used AFTER Phoebe's death.
And to the mother who responded to my use of adjectives that, in my opinion and the opinions of many others, accurately describes these "mean girls" -- just where do you think those girls learned how to use their cache of word weapons to drive a young girl to death?
Their parents.
Our children model our own behavior, speak our own words, mirror our actions, our anything. Whether our children turn what they learn from positive to negative is beyond our control.
But teaching our children that words ARE used as weapons if used improperly - it has to start with us. With the continuing advancement of technology that gives these bullies more and more opportunity to hone their vocabularly and the ability to use their "weapons in the form of words" and the very fact that they instill fear into those who cross them, it is up to the parents to take them down and take away their caches. It has to start with the parents.
And until the "mean girls" and all the bullies are held accountable for their actions by the very people who gave them life on this Earth, and by the school officials who dance circles around their own anti-bullying creeds which are mere words typed onto pieces of paper that lack barracuda teeth, kids like Phoebe Prince are going to continue to be tormented and bullied for no reason other than they take up space in the halls where the "mean girls" walk and consider their domain - and end up taking their own lives because in their devastated minds, death is far better than being destroyed by weapons in the form of words.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Cyberbullying - A Crime without Weapons - Or Is It?
One of my favorite bands is a group named Fallout Boy. There is a song called "This Ain't A Scene, It's An Arms Race" and one line in that song hit home with me when I read about the latest teen who died tragically by taking her own life because she had been bullied:
"I am an arms dealer, fitting you with weapons in the form of words ..."
That one line is so eerily and horribly descriptive of how cyberbullying - in its worst form - can change lives forever.
South Hadley teen Phoebe Prince was tired of being the bull eyes target of those weapons being hefted and used by her tormentors. Perhaps her soul was so shot through full of holes she could not stand to watch pieces of her fall off onto the floor anymore, her life blood ebb away each day so distraught and devastated she was by the cruelty she had sustained - mostly in the form of words.
Bullying is and will continue to be part of the evolution of mankind. It does not sector itself just to teens but to all walks of life. I am bullied because of where I live, I am taunted because I live in "low income housing" yet I graduated at the top of my class in high school, I hold a bachelor's degree in criminal justice from Northeastern University, graduating summa cum laud with a 3.89 GPA. But still, because of where I live, and have resided for the past seven years with my son, I am shunned, made fun of and shut out of the community in many ways. Isn't that form of bullying? It certainly is. And once again, my tormentors use cleverly disguised words and phrases, but in the end, the result is the same: unbearable pain and sorrow - all because of where I live. But I am a strong person and although there are times when I hit rock bottom and ask myself is it all worthwhile, I only have to look at my son to answer that question. But I wonder if he will become the victim of bullying as he grows older - just because of where he lives.
But what made Phoebe Prince take her own life? She was a beautiful girl, apparently well-liked, she came from Ireland and she probably possessed a beautiful Irish brogue. Why did her tormentors target her? Was it a pair of shoes that caused her tormentors to envy and attack her? A new purse? A new hairstyle? One wrong look at a teenage guy in the hallway?
We still don't know - or the general population doesn't know because no details were released. The only genuine facts are that Phoebe Prince is dead and her tormentors will not be returning to South Hadley High School.
Why can't we know their names? Why can't these horrible teens be exposed for the soul-less, shallow and devoid of emotional humans that they must be to have so cruelly vented their hatred, anger and meanness on Phoebe that she hung herself to escape their weapons?
These pond scum teens used words as their weapons: words written in text messages, words written on social networking sites like Facebook and My Space, and words used in person - directed at Phoebe Prince.
Words as weapons. This is NOT a new concept. There was a time when there was not an internet to pass these weapons from person to person, no cell phones on which to text message, no social networking sites on which to post sentences and paragraphs that were to be used as weapons of destruction. What teens had - and others - were lined pieces of paper with those same cruel words scribbled on them and passed from student to student, weapons in the form of words scribbled on bathroom walls, lockers and cars.
Bullying itself has evolved as humankind has evolved, as technology has evolved. Why haven't the schools protected its students who are the targets of now far more sophisticated weapons? Where does the protection start? I still believe it begins with the parents. I get that teens clam up and refuse to disclose the perps of the bullying for fear of it becoming worse. But frankly, I'd rather get involved and have an angry teen son than a dead teen son because I didn't interfere and find out what the hell was going on in his life that was causing my son such anguish.
Here in Massachusetts, anti-bullying legislature is awaiting Senate review.
And once again - this very legislature is nothing but a bunch of words and sentences strung together to create laws to prevent bullying. Punish the tormentors and bullies? Sure. Go ahead.
But it's not going to stop them because they know the true power of "weapons in the form of words" and these bullies - whether pre-teens, teens or adults - they will always have access to these weapons and that gives them unimaginable power that unfortunately, isn't something that being expelled from school or jail time is going to curb.
Words themselves are not heartless or cruel or without reason. They only become that way when they are used by humans which means that bullying - in all forms - is not going to end until humankind does.
"I am an arms dealer fitting you with weapons in the form of words ..."
"I am an arms dealer, fitting you with weapons in the form of words ..."
That one line is so eerily and horribly descriptive of how cyberbullying - in its worst form - can change lives forever.
South Hadley teen Phoebe Prince was tired of being the bull eyes target of those weapons being hefted and used by her tormentors. Perhaps her soul was so shot through full of holes she could not stand to watch pieces of her fall off onto the floor anymore, her life blood ebb away each day so distraught and devastated she was by the cruelty she had sustained - mostly in the form of words.
Bullying is and will continue to be part of the evolution of mankind. It does not sector itself just to teens but to all walks of life. I am bullied because of where I live, I am taunted because I live in "low income housing" yet I graduated at the top of my class in high school, I hold a bachelor's degree in criminal justice from Northeastern University, graduating summa cum laud with a 3.89 GPA. But still, because of where I live, and have resided for the past seven years with my son, I am shunned, made fun of and shut out of the community in many ways. Isn't that form of bullying? It certainly is. And once again, my tormentors use cleverly disguised words and phrases, but in the end, the result is the same: unbearable pain and sorrow - all because of where I live. But I am a strong person and although there are times when I hit rock bottom and ask myself is it all worthwhile, I only have to look at my son to answer that question. But I wonder if he will become the victim of bullying as he grows older - just because of where he lives.
But what made Phoebe Prince take her own life? She was a beautiful girl, apparently well-liked, she came from Ireland and she probably possessed a beautiful Irish brogue. Why did her tormentors target her? Was it a pair of shoes that caused her tormentors to envy and attack her? A new purse? A new hairstyle? One wrong look at a teenage guy in the hallway?
We still don't know - or the general population doesn't know because no details were released. The only genuine facts are that Phoebe Prince is dead and her tormentors will not be returning to South Hadley High School.
Why can't we know their names? Why can't these horrible teens be exposed for the soul-less, shallow and devoid of emotional humans that they must be to have so cruelly vented their hatred, anger and meanness on Phoebe that she hung herself to escape their weapons?
These pond scum teens used words as their weapons: words written in text messages, words written on social networking sites like Facebook and My Space, and words used in person - directed at Phoebe Prince.
Words as weapons. This is NOT a new concept. There was a time when there was not an internet to pass these weapons from person to person, no cell phones on which to text message, no social networking sites on which to post sentences and paragraphs that were to be used as weapons of destruction. What teens had - and others - were lined pieces of paper with those same cruel words scribbled on them and passed from student to student, weapons in the form of words scribbled on bathroom walls, lockers and cars.
Bullying itself has evolved as humankind has evolved, as technology has evolved. Why haven't the schools protected its students who are the targets of now far more sophisticated weapons? Where does the protection start? I still believe it begins with the parents. I get that teens clam up and refuse to disclose the perps of the bullying for fear of it becoming worse. But frankly, I'd rather get involved and have an angry teen son than a dead teen son because I didn't interfere and find out what the hell was going on in his life that was causing my son such anguish.
Here in Massachusetts, anti-bullying legislature is awaiting Senate review.
And once again - this very legislature is nothing but a bunch of words and sentences strung together to create laws to prevent bullying. Punish the tormentors and bullies? Sure. Go ahead.
But it's not going to stop them because they know the true power of "weapons in the form of words" and these bullies - whether pre-teens, teens or adults - they will always have access to these weapons and that gives them unimaginable power that unfortunately, isn't something that being expelled from school or jail time is going to curb.
Words themselves are not heartless or cruel or without reason. They only become that way when they are used by humans which means that bullying - in all forms - is not going to end until humankind does.
"I am an arms dealer fitting you with weapons in the form of words ..."
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Eat My Shorts
Can we talk?
Right now, in a town not too far from where I dry my own clothes is a battle raging and a fierce one at that. And no, it's not over speeding drivers, neighborhood drugs or unscooped poop.
The battle rages over "unmentionables" flapping in the breeze, hanging peacefully from a clothesline. (Don't you love that word "unmentionables? It gives the connotation that Brace's lingerie consists of black leather dominatrix corsets with devil heads and skulls and crossbones emblazoned across the breast area and of course, crotchless. Ha, if she DID have those kinds of THOSE unmentionables hanging from her clotheslines, how much you wanna bet the husbands of the wives who are complaining would be foaming at the mouth and have phantasmagorical (is that a word?) dreams of naughtiness beyond comprehension.)
Concord (Mass.) resident Peggy Brace is embracing eco-friendly measures by foregoing an electric or gas dryer and hanging her clothes on a clothesline to dry. She air-dries her clothes outside, even in winter. And this alleged heinous, clothesline-hanging criminal act is - GASP -being committed ON HER OWN PROPERTY.
Can I get a "GET A LIFE PEOPLE" from everyone?
Yes, folks, it's the old NIMBY attitude raising it's ugly head: Not In My Backyard! Pretty soon you'll see signs up on neighbor's lawn that read "BRACE GO BRALESS" or "HANG'EM HIGH - INSIDE YOUR HOUSE" or some other nonsensical drivelous statements.
In a story on www.myfoxboston.com, Brace is quoted as saying "It's so silly. I don't know what the hang-up is" referring to the bevy of complaints by her neighbors over her clothesline. Brace is also quoted as saying "It indicates poverty if you hang out your wash."
Really? Then clearly the residents of her neighborhood are stuck up million dollar snobby bitches who wouldn't know poverty if it hit them with a cast iron frying pan.
In a world where our environment is constantly being destroyed by our failure to consistently recycle, pollutants being pumped into our atmosphere by the millions of gallons and slowly poking holes in our ozone, and our forests being destroyed by greedy builders who care nothing about destroying habitats of endangered species, the residents of Brace's Concord, Massachusetts neighborhood are bitching about a clothesline.
C'mon people. If you don't like it, don't look! And it's not like Brace's clothes are hanging out there 24/7 365. If I could do it, I would.
My own Mom used to hang out our clothes in the summertime when I was growing up in Vermont and when I put on my clothes, the warmth of the sun wrapped itself around me like a safe cocoon and I was surrounded by the familiar smells of summer. OK, a time or two a stray ladybug crawled out of my shorts or my sleeveless shirts but that didn't bother me at all.
But this is beyond petty and ridiculous. There are far more important things in our world to complain about that someones "unmentionables."
If I were Peggy Brace, I'd hammer a really big sign into the ground - on her property of course - proclaiming the legendary words of one Bart Simpson:
"EAT MY SHORTS."
Right now, in a town not too far from where I dry my own clothes is a battle raging and a fierce one at that. And no, it's not over speeding drivers, neighborhood drugs or unscooped poop.
The battle rages over "unmentionables" flapping in the breeze, hanging peacefully from a clothesline. (Don't you love that word "unmentionables? It gives the connotation that Brace's lingerie consists of black leather dominatrix corsets with devil heads and skulls and crossbones emblazoned across the breast area and of course, crotchless. Ha, if she DID have those kinds of THOSE unmentionables hanging from her clotheslines, how much you wanna bet the husbands of the wives who are complaining would be foaming at the mouth and have phantasmagorical (is that a word?) dreams of naughtiness beyond comprehension.)
Concord (Mass.) resident Peggy Brace is embracing eco-friendly measures by foregoing an electric or gas dryer and hanging her clothes on a clothesline to dry. She air-dries her clothes outside, even in winter. And this alleged heinous, clothesline-hanging criminal act is - GASP -being committed ON HER OWN PROPERTY.
Can I get a "GET A LIFE PEOPLE" from everyone?
Yes, folks, it's the old NIMBY attitude raising it's ugly head: Not In My Backyard! Pretty soon you'll see signs up on neighbor's lawn that read "BRACE GO BRALESS" or "HANG'EM HIGH - INSIDE YOUR HOUSE" or some other nonsensical drivelous statements.
In a story on www.myfoxboston.com, Brace is quoted as saying "It's so silly. I don't know what the hang-up is" referring to the bevy of complaints by her neighbors over her clothesline. Brace is also quoted as saying "It indicates poverty if you hang out your wash."
Really? Then clearly the residents of her neighborhood are stuck up million dollar snobby bitches who wouldn't know poverty if it hit them with a cast iron frying pan.
In a world where our environment is constantly being destroyed by our failure to consistently recycle, pollutants being pumped into our atmosphere by the millions of gallons and slowly poking holes in our ozone, and our forests being destroyed by greedy builders who care nothing about destroying habitats of endangered species, the residents of Brace's Concord, Massachusetts neighborhood are bitching about a clothesline.
C'mon people. If you don't like it, don't look! And it's not like Brace's clothes are hanging out there 24/7 365. If I could do it, I would.
My own Mom used to hang out our clothes in the summertime when I was growing up in Vermont and when I put on my clothes, the warmth of the sun wrapped itself around me like a safe cocoon and I was surrounded by the familiar smells of summer. OK, a time or two a stray ladybug crawled out of my shorts or my sleeveless shirts but that didn't bother me at all.
But this is beyond petty and ridiculous. There are far more important things in our world to complain about that someones "unmentionables."
If I were Peggy Brace, I'd hammer a really big sign into the ground - on her property of course - proclaiming the legendary words of one Bart Simpson:
"EAT MY SHORTS."
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Drunk Driving Laws Not Tough Enough
Finally, a judge who threw the book at someone who tried to pull a fast one in the courtroom (not a new concept).
On Monday, January 4, 2010, Massachusetts judge Matthew J. Nestor refused to "buy the claim" that disgraced Mass. Senator Anthony D. Galluccio's toothpaste caused the Breathalyzer to register alcohol content in Galluccio's body. Judge Nestor (thank you, thank you, thank you) sentenced Galluccio to one year in jail for violating probationary terms that Galluccio was to abstain from alcohol after a hit-and-run accident in October, 2009. Galluccio's drunk driving "transgressions" (love that word) go back to 1984 and until Judge Nestor threw the book at him, Galluccio seemed to have walked away from each DUI mishap without even a slap on his wrist.
Mass. drunk driving laws are useless. What is the worse these losers get? A year? Two years? Lifetime revocation of their driving license? Do these judges actually think that a piece of paper that says "you can't drive for the rest of your life" is going to stop people from actually (a) drinking and (b) getting back into their cars and driving - sober or drunk?
Nope.
Galluccio is obviously in denial about his alcohol problem. His toothpaste defense was so far beyond laughable it isn't funny anymore. Denial is commonplace for alcoholics. Trust me - I lived in that life first-hand with my ex-husband who battled an alcohol problem for years until he was diagnosed with colon cancer in September 2008 and was pretty much told if he kept drinking, he'd be dead within a year. I can't say for sure if he stopped drinking but my son tells me he never sees alcohol at his dad's house anymore. But that doesn't mean my ex has stopped drinking.
I went to Alanon meetings a long, long time ago and listened to people talk about their "addiction" and their "disease" and frankly, I sat there shaking my head at everyone because I felt like standing up and saying "Excuse me. Was anyone holding a gun to your head when you took that first drink? No. Was anyone holding a gun to your head when you got into your car and drove drunk?" No. And on and on and on. In my analytical brain, alcoholism is NOT a disease - it is simply a cop out, a way for people to be weak and hide their everyday troubles - whatever they may be - and then try to "defend" their drinking by claiming "I have a job. I pay my bills. I take care of my kids."
Oh really? And if you're off your rocker drunk at 2 a.m. and your child wakes up with a 103 fever and has to go to the ER, and you get in your car and drive into a tree and kill your child, what's your defense then, huh asshole?
Give me a break.
Maybe because I am so jaded, maybe because I am so cynical and unrelenting in my show of sympathy that I have none for drunk drivers. Everyone one of them should be put in jail for 10 years and the key tossed away.
I remember years ago a group of people (I can't name names or the group) talked about getting together for "cocktails" at 11 a.m. and this "cocktail hour" would include a "playgroup" for their children at the home of the person hosting this cocktail get together. I was just shocked and disgusted by how many of these "persons" thought nothing of driving to this person's home with their infants and toddlers in tow, ingesting 2 or 3 cocktails while their children played and then getting back into their cars to drive home.
I protested this absolutely irresponsible and disgusting behavior and was slammed to the wall for my comments. All of them thought it was perfectly fine to drink and drive with their kids in the car. Most of them said "Well, it's only 2 or 3 and I don't live very far away so it's no big deal."
I just could not pick up my jaw off the floor. Appalled just doesn't cover how I felt toward these so-called parents.
When I was 16 years old, I worked at a CVS. A guy named Greg came in on a Friday night - he was really handsome (and 18 years old), in his first year of college and asked me for my phone number. He called me later that night, we talked for a few minutes and we made tentative plans to go to the movies on Sunday. He told me was driving to the Cape that night to see his Mom and Dad.
Sunday morning, I opened the newspaper to see his face on the front page. He was dead, killed by a drunk driver. That driver got 2 years in prison for killing Greg. I was devastated by his death.
Now as a mother to a child whose father was an alcoholic (again, I do not know if my ex has truly stopped drinking - I can only hope he has), I would give anything to see stricter drunk driving laws enacted but it will never happen because the same people who make our laws drink alcohol, the same judges who give light sentences to drunk drivers drink alcohol - and I will bet a year's worth of paychecks that many of them have driven drunk but just never been caught.
Case in point: Early in April, 2009, Massachusetts Judge Christine M. McEvoy was charged with drunk driving. She made some lame statement about her "judgment" and blah blah blah.
Heard it all before. Save it, Judge. You and the rest of the judges and attorneys and cops and everyone who drinks and drives and thinks they are either above the law, immune to the penalties or simply blessed with immortality.
Wrong.
Another case in point: How about that wrong-way crash mother who was driving drunk in New York and killed eight people, including all 3 of her brother's children, 2 of her own, herself and 2 others in another car? I was just disgusted at how her family defended her to the hilt that she wasn't an alcoholic, she couldn't have been drinking, they were going to protest the autopsy results, blah blah blah.
Wake up you morons. Eight people are DEAD because this woman drank herself into oblivion, got into her mini van and drove the wrong way down a NY freeway and killed eight people, most of them children. How about thinking about that? She effectively wiped out her brother's family.
When is this going to end? When are people going to realize that drinking and driving - and perhaps not even just driving - but drinking alcohol period changes your chemical makeup of your body whether you have 1 or 100? You are NOT the same functioning person as you are if you have NO alcohol in your body.
Until are laws are so stiff and so harsh that drunk drivers are put away for life, they are going to continue to murder, maim and permanently disfigure innocent people, destroy families and careers but their careless, pathetic irresponsible actions. "Oh, I just had two. Or I just had three." Oh, oops. Didn't see that tree coming. Oh, oops. Forgot to buckle my infant baby into his car seat and oh, oops, the cops had to dig my child out of the windshield."
There is no law tough enough to stop drunk drivers. Life in prison with no chance of parole is the only answer. Or the death penalty.
Eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth.
You drink, you drive, you kill, then you should die, too. Why should drunk drivers get to live when they take other lives?
Maybe my view is harsh and unsympathetic but 32 years ago, a young man's life, a smile that I never forgot was snuffed out forever because of a drunk driver. I never got to see Greg's smile again, I never got to hear his voice again.
Drunk drivers should be snuffed out exactly the same way.
On Monday, January 4, 2010, Massachusetts judge Matthew J. Nestor refused to "buy the claim" that disgraced Mass. Senator Anthony D. Galluccio's toothpaste caused the Breathalyzer to register alcohol content in Galluccio's body. Judge Nestor (thank you, thank you, thank you) sentenced Galluccio to one year in jail for violating probationary terms that Galluccio was to abstain from alcohol after a hit-and-run accident in October, 2009. Galluccio's drunk driving "transgressions" (love that word) go back to 1984 and until Judge Nestor threw the book at him, Galluccio seemed to have walked away from each DUI mishap without even a slap on his wrist.
Mass. drunk driving laws are useless. What is the worse these losers get? A year? Two years? Lifetime revocation of their driving license? Do these judges actually think that a piece of paper that says "you can't drive for the rest of your life" is going to stop people from actually (a) drinking and (b) getting back into their cars and driving - sober or drunk?
Nope.
Galluccio is obviously in denial about his alcohol problem. His toothpaste defense was so far beyond laughable it isn't funny anymore. Denial is commonplace for alcoholics. Trust me - I lived in that life first-hand with my ex-husband who battled an alcohol problem for years until he was diagnosed with colon cancer in September 2008 and was pretty much told if he kept drinking, he'd be dead within a year. I can't say for sure if he stopped drinking but my son tells me he never sees alcohol at his dad's house anymore. But that doesn't mean my ex has stopped drinking.
I went to Alanon meetings a long, long time ago and listened to people talk about their "addiction" and their "disease" and frankly, I sat there shaking my head at everyone because I felt like standing up and saying "Excuse me. Was anyone holding a gun to your head when you took that first drink? No. Was anyone holding a gun to your head when you got into your car and drove drunk?" No. And on and on and on. In my analytical brain, alcoholism is NOT a disease - it is simply a cop out, a way for people to be weak and hide their everyday troubles - whatever they may be - and then try to "defend" their drinking by claiming "I have a job. I pay my bills. I take care of my kids."
Oh really? And if you're off your rocker drunk at 2 a.m. and your child wakes up with a 103 fever and has to go to the ER, and you get in your car and drive into a tree and kill your child, what's your defense then, huh asshole?
Give me a break.
Maybe because I am so jaded, maybe because I am so cynical and unrelenting in my show of sympathy that I have none for drunk drivers. Everyone one of them should be put in jail for 10 years and the key tossed away.
I remember years ago a group of people (I can't name names or the group) talked about getting together for "cocktails" at 11 a.m. and this "cocktail hour" would include a "playgroup" for their children at the home of the person hosting this cocktail get together. I was just shocked and disgusted by how many of these "persons" thought nothing of driving to this person's home with their infants and toddlers in tow, ingesting 2 or 3 cocktails while their children played and then getting back into their cars to drive home.
I protested this absolutely irresponsible and disgusting behavior and was slammed to the wall for my comments. All of them thought it was perfectly fine to drink and drive with their kids in the car. Most of them said "Well, it's only 2 or 3 and I don't live very far away so it's no big deal."
I just could not pick up my jaw off the floor. Appalled just doesn't cover how I felt toward these so-called parents.
When I was 16 years old, I worked at a CVS. A guy named Greg came in on a Friday night - he was really handsome (and 18 years old), in his first year of college and asked me for my phone number. He called me later that night, we talked for a few minutes and we made tentative plans to go to the movies on Sunday. He told me was driving to the Cape that night to see his Mom and Dad.
Sunday morning, I opened the newspaper to see his face on the front page. He was dead, killed by a drunk driver. That driver got 2 years in prison for killing Greg. I was devastated by his death.
Now as a mother to a child whose father was an alcoholic (again, I do not know if my ex has truly stopped drinking - I can only hope he has), I would give anything to see stricter drunk driving laws enacted but it will never happen because the same people who make our laws drink alcohol, the same judges who give light sentences to drunk drivers drink alcohol - and I will bet a year's worth of paychecks that many of them have driven drunk but just never been caught.
Case in point: Early in April, 2009, Massachusetts Judge Christine M. McEvoy was charged with drunk driving. She made some lame statement about her "judgment" and blah blah blah.
Heard it all before. Save it, Judge. You and the rest of the judges and attorneys and cops and everyone who drinks and drives and thinks they are either above the law, immune to the penalties or simply blessed with immortality.
Wrong.
Another case in point: How about that wrong-way crash mother who was driving drunk in New York and killed eight people, including all 3 of her brother's children, 2 of her own, herself and 2 others in another car? I was just disgusted at how her family defended her to the hilt that she wasn't an alcoholic, she couldn't have been drinking, they were going to protest the autopsy results, blah blah blah.
Wake up you morons. Eight people are DEAD because this woman drank herself into oblivion, got into her mini van and drove the wrong way down a NY freeway and killed eight people, most of them children. How about thinking about that? She effectively wiped out her brother's family.
When is this going to end? When are people going to realize that drinking and driving - and perhaps not even just driving - but drinking alcohol period changes your chemical makeup of your body whether you have 1 or 100? You are NOT the same functioning person as you are if you have NO alcohol in your body.
Until are laws are so stiff and so harsh that drunk drivers are put away for life, they are going to continue to murder, maim and permanently disfigure innocent people, destroy families and careers but their careless, pathetic irresponsible actions. "Oh, I just had two. Or I just had three." Oh, oops. Didn't see that tree coming. Oh, oops. Forgot to buckle my infant baby into his car seat and oh, oops, the cops had to dig my child out of the windshield."
There is no law tough enough to stop drunk drivers. Life in prison with no chance of parole is the only answer. Or the death penalty.
Eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth.
You drink, you drive, you kill, then you should die, too. Why should drunk drivers get to live when they take other lives?
Maybe my view is harsh and unsympathetic but 32 years ago, a young man's life, a smile that I never forgot was snuffed out forever because of a drunk driver. I never got to see Greg's smile again, I never got to hear his voice again.
Drunk drivers should be snuffed out exactly the same way.
Monday, January 4, 2010
And (Not) Justice For All
The brain is an amazing source of consternation because somehow, it has this twisted way of not shutting down at night and generating thought after thought till all hours of the morning which in essence then keeps me up and makes me a first-class grouch thereafter.
The past week, rampant thoughts of what is going on around me with regard to illegal immigrants and the benefits which are afforded them - and not me - have pretty much taken over my thought process.
Case in point: As a single mother, I rely solely on my part time income and my child support. My rent is 30 percent of my income which suffice to say is nearly my entire child support. If I work more, my rent goes up. So I am effectively in a corner with my back up against a really hard brick wall and the edges of the concrete of the bricks are making permanent marks in my back because I have been in this position forever. I can't go out and get a full time job because my rent will skyrocket and I'll be throwing away all my money for what - to live in the single serving cereal box I live in? That's what sucks because the more you make, the higher your rent goes and you can't save any money for a down payment for a house because you're giving it all to the slumlords who run the kind of place in which I reside.
So I put my name on a waiting list for a "voucher" to help with my son's after school program which is considered "child care." I have this after school care because it has vacation programs for which my son qualifies because he is in the regular after-school program and I have to work so my son has a place to go during school vacations. Ditto for the majority of the holidays that fall during the regular school year. Some of these holidays I receive an off day from work so I elect to keep my son with me to save myself some money.
I do this single parent thing all by myself. My closest relative is my Mom and she lives in another state. She is almost 79 years old, doesn't drive more than a mile to the grocery store and back and is living out the rest of her life comfortably and in peace. She is not a child care option. And there are very, very few people I would trust with the care of my son. So for the most part, I am alone.
I have been on this "waiting list" for a child care voucher going on 3 years. I am not on welfare. I do receive food stamps out of necessity - a whopping $16 a month because someone decided that my $15,000 per year bottom of the ocean below the poverty line income was more than enough money for me to buy groceries for me and my son who brings his lunch to school 3 out of the 5 school days and for whom I pack a lunch every day Monday through Friday for 10 weeks of summer vacations. Short of starving myself or my son, I had to laugh at the $16 allotment of food stamps.
But what I wasn't laughing when reality set in and I pictured this scenario: Illegal immigrants apply for food stamps. A social security number is required or at least on the application I - born, raised U.S. Citizen - fills out. Does anyone check the validity of the social security numbers presented? Or do these illegals - which number by the thousands here in Massachusetts - have a "different" form given to them to fill out? They claim they aren't working. I'm sorry but my own ex-husband's wife (who is Brazilian) has a cleaning job that she earns cash from and doesn't report. I know how this goes. Illegals work "under the table" for cash, don't report their income (how can they - they're illegal and don't have social security numbers) but they get food stamps (more than $16 a month I am sure), get better health care than I do (because their income is allegedly lower than mine - yah right) AND (drum roll please) they go on welfare which automatically qualifies them for CHILD CARE VOUCHERS WOOHOO!
And here I am, born, bred U.S. Citizen who reports her income, reports her child support and I am getting screwed 27 different ways to Texas by the illegals. But is it them or the government agencies who are short-staffed, short-changed or just plain short of qualified people who obviously don't have enough have enough brains in their head to realize how unfair our laws truly are???!!!
We CATER to illegals and leave our own people - like myself who are in dire need of services - or more than what is allotted to me - in the dust of the illegals.
I am sorry but illegal immigrants do not deserve to get the benefits that I and other U.S. Citizens rightfully deserve.
Now don't get me wrong because I live in subsidized housing and I am surrounded by people who are committing varying degrees of housing fraud, tax evasion, etc. and who are U.S. Citizens. But what good is it going to do me to tattle on them? How would it benefit me? It doesn't and it never will. So I suffer in silence, I pay my rent, I stay out of trouble and pray for a miracle. I hope for what comes around goes around but it seems that everyone just keeps getting away with all kinds of shit while I struggle with a rope tightening around my neck pretty much every day. These housing fraud-ers and tax evaders and lease violators aren't hurting me in any way except in principal but I AM getting hurt because I am doing the right thing, playing by the rules, living within the provisions of my lease and keeping my nose clean!!! I don't do drugs, I don't have alcohol-laden parties and oh yes - I don't have a dog. I have a fish that's near death but I don't know if that counts. I come home some days to the smell of drugs cooking or being smoked or whatever the fuck people do with them. I come home to find gigantic holes punched in the walls because some asshole tenant decided to take out his or her frustration and now the damage makes us all look bad - makes us ALL look like trash - just like this town labels us. And I hate being labeled as trash. I hate being labeled at all.
And then I have to explain to my son about the damage. I tell him he will NOT grow up to be like that. I pray that I am getting through to him at 9 1/2 years old.
As much as I struggle to keep my head above water, the constant thorn in my side is knowing that illegal immigrants are getting my child care vouchers because they have fake/fraudulent/dead people's social security numbers or just random made up socials to secure benefits they do not deserve. Who is worse: The illegals getting benefits they don't deserve or the people around me committing housing fraud BECAUSE THEY CAN?
Who do I complain to? Who would actually look into this for me? No one. If I go to the property manager and question her background check requirements or how the paperwork is filled out or the information that is presented by tenants or prospective tenants, I will probably be evicted or retaliated against in some way for even questioning what's supposed to be none of my business. Forgive me for being a summa cum laud college graduate, having a GPA at graduation of 3.8 and actually having brains in my head and not in my ass. But that's what would happen if I even made a squeak about how the requirements for securing housing in this place I live. This place is owned by slumlords who don't give a shit about any of us.
Ditto for child care vouchers. Do these people actually check the paperwork? Obviously not because I am STILL on the waiting list for child care and I would give a million dollars if I had it to see who's gotten the child care voucher I covet - like church wine - ahead of me. If anyone tries to tell me that ALL the people who have gotten those vouchers ahead of me are U.S. Citizens - I am going to throw up - and then some.
What if I went to some of these illegals' countries? Do you think I could get away with the shit they do here in the United States? I'd be shot on sight. Dead. Gone.
I can sit here and blog about illegals and about the unfairness of it all but nothing is ever going to change. I even emailed Mike Beaudette who is an undercover report for Fox25 News here in Massachusetts and even he ignored me. I guess there are just some stories that reporters won't touch because of politics. And here I thought Fox 25 News was pretty damn liberal and would jump on an investigation into fraud by illegal immigrants.
Oh wait. I know why he didn't contact me. It's not even a story anymore.
Illegal immgrants getting benefits that U.S. Citizens don't is an everyday occurrence like going to the grocery store for milk and eggs. Who wants to investigate that?
The past week, rampant thoughts of what is going on around me with regard to illegal immigrants and the benefits which are afforded them - and not me - have pretty much taken over my thought process.
Case in point: As a single mother, I rely solely on my part time income and my child support. My rent is 30 percent of my income which suffice to say is nearly my entire child support. If I work more, my rent goes up. So I am effectively in a corner with my back up against a really hard brick wall and the edges of the concrete of the bricks are making permanent marks in my back because I have been in this position forever. I can't go out and get a full time job because my rent will skyrocket and I'll be throwing away all my money for what - to live in the single serving cereal box I live in? That's what sucks because the more you make, the higher your rent goes and you can't save any money for a down payment for a house because you're giving it all to the slumlords who run the kind of place in which I reside.
So I put my name on a waiting list for a "voucher" to help with my son's after school program which is considered "child care." I have this after school care because it has vacation programs for which my son qualifies because he is in the regular after-school program and I have to work so my son has a place to go during school vacations. Ditto for the majority of the holidays that fall during the regular school year. Some of these holidays I receive an off day from work so I elect to keep my son with me to save myself some money.
I do this single parent thing all by myself. My closest relative is my Mom and she lives in another state. She is almost 79 years old, doesn't drive more than a mile to the grocery store and back and is living out the rest of her life comfortably and in peace. She is not a child care option. And there are very, very few people I would trust with the care of my son. So for the most part, I am alone.
I have been on this "waiting list" for a child care voucher going on 3 years. I am not on welfare. I do receive food stamps out of necessity - a whopping $16 a month because someone decided that my $15,000 per year bottom of the ocean below the poverty line income was more than enough money for me to buy groceries for me and my son who brings his lunch to school 3 out of the 5 school days and for whom I pack a lunch every day Monday through Friday for 10 weeks of summer vacations. Short of starving myself or my son, I had to laugh at the $16 allotment of food stamps.
But what I wasn't laughing when reality set in and I pictured this scenario: Illegal immigrants apply for food stamps. A social security number is required or at least on the application I - born, raised U.S. Citizen - fills out. Does anyone check the validity of the social security numbers presented? Or do these illegals - which number by the thousands here in Massachusetts - have a "different" form given to them to fill out? They claim they aren't working. I'm sorry but my own ex-husband's wife (who is Brazilian) has a cleaning job that she earns cash from and doesn't report. I know how this goes. Illegals work "under the table" for cash, don't report their income (how can they - they're illegal and don't have social security numbers) but they get food stamps (more than $16 a month I am sure), get better health care than I do (because their income is allegedly lower than mine - yah right) AND (drum roll please) they go on welfare which automatically qualifies them for CHILD CARE VOUCHERS WOOHOO!
And here I am, born, bred U.S. Citizen who reports her income, reports her child support and I am getting screwed 27 different ways to Texas by the illegals. But is it them or the government agencies who are short-staffed, short-changed or just plain short of qualified people who obviously don't have enough have enough brains in their head to realize how unfair our laws truly are???!!!
We CATER to illegals and leave our own people - like myself who are in dire need of services - or more than what is allotted to me - in the dust of the illegals.
I am sorry but illegal immigrants do not deserve to get the benefits that I and other U.S. Citizens rightfully deserve.
Now don't get me wrong because I live in subsidized housing and I am surrounded by people who are committing varying degrees of housing fraud, tax evasion, etc. and who are U.S. Citizens. But what good is it going to do me to tattle on them? How would it benefit me? It doesn't and it never will. So I suffer in silence, I pay my rent, I stay out of trouble and pray for a miracle. I hope for what comes around goes around but it seems that everyone just keeps getting away with all kinds of shit while I struggle with a rope tightening around my neck pretty much every day. These housing fraud-ers and tax evaders and lease violators aren't hurting me in any way except in principal but I AM getting hurt because I am doing the right thing, playing by the rules, living within the provisions of my lease and keeping my nose clean!!! I don't do drugs, I don't have alcohol-laden parties and oh yes - I don't have a dog. I have a fish that's near death but I don't know if that counts. I come home some days to the smell of drugs cooking or being smoked or whatever the fuck people do with them. I come home to find gigantic holes punched in the walls because some asshole tenant decided to take out his or her frustration and now the damage makes us all look bad - makes us ALL look like trash - just like this town labels us. And I hate being labeled as trash. I hate being labeled at all.
And then I have to explain to my son about the damage. I tell him he will NOT grow up to be like that. I pray that I am getting through to him at 9 1/2 years old.
As much as I struggle to keep my head above water, the constant thorn in my side is knowing that illegal immigrants are getting my child care vouchers because they have fake/fraudulent/dead people's social security numbers or just random made up socials to secure benefits they do not deserve. Who is worse: The illegals getting benefits they don't deserve or the people around me committing housing fraud BECAUSE THEY CAN?
Who do I complain to? Who would actually look into this for me? No one. If I go to the property manager and question her background check requirements or how the paperwork is filled out or the information that is presented by tenants or prospective tenants, I will probably be evicted or retaliated against in some way for even questioning what's supposed to be none of my business. Forgive me for being a summa cum laud college graduate, having a GPA at graduation of 3.8 and actually having brains in my head and not in my ass. But that's what would happen if I even made a squeak about how the requirements for securing housing in this place I live. This place is owned by slumlords who don't give a shit about any of us.
Ditto for child care vouchers. Do these people actually check the paperwork? Obviously not because I am STILL on the waiting list for child care and I would give a million dollars if I had it to see who's gotten the child care voucher I covet - like church wine - ahead of me. If anyone tries to tell me that ALL the people who have gotten those vouchers ahead of me are U.S. Citizens - I am going to throw up - and then some.
What if I went to some of these illegals' countries? Do you think I could get away with the shit they do here in the United States? I'd be shot on sight. Dead. Gone.
I can sit here and blog about illegals and about the unfairness of it all but nothing is ever going to change. I even emailed Mike Beaudette who is an undercover report for Fox25 News here in Massachusetts and even he ignored me. I guess there are just some stories that reporters won't touch because of politics. And here I thought Fox 25 News was pretty damn liberal and would jump on an investigation into fraud by illegal immigrants.
Oh wait. I know why he didn't contact me. It's not even a story anymore.
Illegal immgrants getting benefits that U.S. Citizens don't is an everyday occurrence like going to the grocery store for milk and eggs. Who wants to investigate that?
Thursday, December 3, 2009
I Thee Wed, I Thee Will Cheat
What is it with celebrities - or for that matter anyone - and their incessant need to commit "transgressions" (in the words of Tigers Woods) upon their respective spouses and/or boyfriends and girlfriends?
Is is really a need as opposed to simply "I don't give a fuck I can do whatever I want because I am so-and-so?" Or is it just another way of bolstering their own unconscious (flagging?) self-esteem to ensure oneself that EVERYONE LOVES ME or EVERYBODY WANTS ME?
Tiger Woods, perhaps golf's greatest athlete or the world's greatest athlete period has been thrust into the spotlight the last week-plus because of allegations that he cheated on his wife. And this is a surprise to anyone why? Obviously, it's not enough that he's a gazillionaire, it's not enough that he's won major golf tournaments that golfers can only salivate about and it's not enough that he's graced the covers of countless magazines and has enough endorsements to line the course at the Masters.
It's never enough for these celebrities. But for all their athleticism, for all their pleadings for privacy, blah blah blah, they still (a) are photographed in compromising situations with people other than their spouse; (b) commit technological suicide by sexting, texting, emailing, voice mailing, etc. to the people with whom they are cheating and pretty much set themselves up for a massive fall into the abyss where - drum roll, please - all celebrities fall because they are just plain dumb asses.
In this age of technology, transgressions, cheating, slutting around, or whatever you want to call it, are going to come back and haunt anyone in spades about a thousand times over. And the people with whom the celebrities are cheating? Ha, don't let that "I didn't know who he/she was when I was screwing them while they were hanging from my chandelier" ignorance fool you. Those texts, sexts, emails, voice mails and cell phone photographs are saved to flash drives and hidden away for future use. These "cheat-ees" (not the cheat-ers) are stacking the deck that someday they, too, will become famous for having fucked so and so.
Take Monica Lewinsky, for example. Unless you are from another planet, as soon as you hear her name you automatically think "she gave the President of the United States a blow job in the oval office." Yes, that is how I want to be thought of 24/7/365 when someone speaks my name.
Not.
Don't give me this oh, she was young and naive and innocent bullshit. She knew exactly what she was doing. My personal opinion - OK - eww - I'm sorry - there are just some things I will not put into my mouth and Bill Clinton's johnson is one of them. Yuck. I have to be reasonably or more attracted to someone (powerful or not) before that even happens).
But there are plenty of people willing and able to be on the receiving end of the transgressions no matter who the cheater is. Maybe it's me but aren't there about 75 million different sexually transmitted diseases running around our planet just waiting to hop on to someone? Nevermind the ones that probably haven't even been discovered yet! Gross.
Congratulations, Tiger. You've probably inherited a few new STDs and passed them along to your wife. That's disgusting. And frankly, I think the truth of the matter is (and I'm sure everyone else feels the same way) is that Elin Woods went after her husband with - no surprise again - a golf club. "Sources" claim that Woods was texting one of his "transgressions" right in his house and his wife bagged him. And now one of those transgressions has turned over an alleged voice mail from Tiger Woods begging her to remove her name from her phone because his wife was probably going to call her and - no surprise - rip her a new you know what. Or something like that.
Remember the movie Moonstruck? Cher, Nicholas Cage, Danny Aiello and Olympia Dukakis? Olympia played Cher's mother in the movie and she caught her husband cheating on her. And she set out to find out why men cheat. The living room scene where Olympia and Danny Aiello (who plays Johnny - Nicholas Cage's brother who can't do wrong to his mother) are sitting plays out something like this:
Olympia: Lemme ask you something Johnny. Why do men cheat?
Danny Aiello: Because they fear death.
I always thought that was hysterical because Olympia Dukakis agreed and she goes on to tell her husband that he's gonna die anyways so he needs to 'stop seeing that woman.'
If only it were that simple.
People cheat for different reasons. But when celebrities cheat, the entire world knows about it because of who they are. The media creates a firestorm and when celebrities like Tiger Woods admit to "transgressions" but don't outright admit the actual cheating and with whom, the media continues to whip its audience into a frenzy with speculations and of course, the "cheat-ees" who eventually surface with all the damaging evidence.
Cheating has nothing to do with death. It's a means to bolster one's ego, one's self-esteem because there is always someone else who will look at you in a different light (maybe not a very good light but a different one at best) and who will compliment you or tell you things that your husband or wife or girlfriend or boyfriend has failed to see or simply overlooked, who will treat you differently than everyone and who will at some point in time become your go-to when the world is closing in around you.
When you are a celebrity, everyone wants a piece of you in some way, shape or form. It's whether you are willing to give yourself up to that kind of life - or to those "transgressions" in order to retain your self-esteem, self-worth or integrity.
What is it with famous people or people with money that make them commit acts of infidelity and then have their lives plastered on the front pages of every tabloid, every online magazine and dot com news center? Is there really something lacking in their lives that they can actually find with someone who has nothing to do with their lives?
Perhaps THAT is the answer. Perhaps celebrities should have boyfriends or girlfriends not in the "business" - people who live in obscurity, single Moms or Dads who don't have money but who actually have integrity and character and self-worth and values. Perhaps those qualities are what celebrities are seeking out when they commit these "transgressions."
I'm not a believer in the grass is always greener in the other side. Whether you are a celebrity with that "I don't give a fuck attitude" or someone like me who does live in obscurity, is not famous in any way, shape or form but has committed my own share of transgressions in my life that really are of no interest to anyone and certainly not worth tabloid fodder, it's how strong a person is on the inside, or how strong his or her own self-esteem and self-worth really is that can determine how you deal with stardom or fame or having gobs of money at your disposal.
If you become successful and/or become extraordinarily good at a natural talent with which you were born, it's up to you how you pursue that talent and how you handle the notoriety that comes with it.
But don't think that you need to have everyone love you or fall all over you to make you any better than who you are. I know there are people that live for that kind of adoration and those tabloids and online dot coms fuel the fire of transgressions - whether sexual or not - day after day and those people live for that kind of fame.
But sooner or later the furor dies down and those people fade out of print until someone else comes along with new transgressions and new fuel for the fire.
Is it really worth it in the end? And if you have children, is it worth it for them to be subjected to these transgressions as well?
Tiger Woods' kids are gonna grow up and find out that their Daddy was a cheater (not on the golf course) and that their Mom went after him with a golf club as a result. Nice job, Woods. Thank you for probably contributing to the delinquency of minors of the future - your own kids.
And ditto for Monica Lewinsky. I can't imagine her having children because sooner or later her kid(s) would find out what she did and be the subject of ridicule. And I'm not inclined to think that a kid will want his Mom at his baseball game who is known as the Mom who once gave a blow job to a president of the United States, among other things.
Every kid has their limits. Perhaps celebrities should find those limits too.
Is is really a need as opposed to simply "I don't give a fuck I can do whatever I want because I am so-and-so?" Or is it just another way of bolstering their own unconscious (flagging?) self-esteem to ensure oneself that EVERYONE LOVES ME or EVERYBODY WANTS ME?
Tiger Woods, perhaps golf's greatest athlete or the world's greatest athlete period has been thrust into the spotlight the last week-plus because of allegations that he cheated on his wife. And this is a surprise to anyone why? Obviously, it's not enough that he's a gazillionaire, it's not enough that he's won major golf tournaments that golfers can only salivate about and it's not enough that he's graced the covers of countless magazines and has enough endorsements to line the course at the Masters.
It's never enough for these celebrities. But for all their athleticism, for all their pleadings for privacy, blah blah blah, they still (a) are photographed in compromising situations with people other than their spouse; (b) commit technological suicide by sexting, texting, emailing, voice mailing, etc. to the people with whom they are cheating and pretty much set themselves up for a massive fall into the abyss where - drum roll, please - all celebrities fall because they are just plain dumb asses.
In this age of technology, transgressions, cheating, slutting around, or whatever you want to call it, are going to come back and haunt anyone in spades about a thousand times over. And the people with whom the celebrities are cheating? Ha, don't let that "I didn't know who he/she was when I was screwing them while they were hanging from my chandelier" ignorance fool you. Those texts, sexts, emails, voice mails and cell phone photographs are saved to flash drives and hidden away for future use. These "cheat-ees" (not the cheat-ers) are stacking the deck that someday they, too, will become famous for having fucked so and so.
Take Monica Lewinsky, for example. Unless you are from another planet, as soon as you hear her name you automatically think "she gave the President of the United States a blow job in the oval office." Yes, that is how I want to be thought of 24/7/365 when someone speaks my name.
Not.
Don't give me this oh, she was young and naive and innocent bullshit. She knew exactly what she was doing. My personal opinion - OK - eww - I'm sorry - there are just some things I will not put into my mouth and Bill Clinton's johnson is one of them. Yuck. I have to be reasonably or more attracted to someone (powerful or not) before that even happens).
But there are plenty of people willing and able to be on the receiving end of the transgressions no matter who the cheater is. Maybe it's me but aren't there about 75 million different sexually transmitted diseases running around our planet just waiting to hop on to someone? Nevermind the ones that probably haven't even been discovered yet! Gross.
Congratulations, Tiger. You've probably inherited a few new STDs and passed them along to your wife. That's disgusting. And frankly, I think the truth of the matter is (and I'm sure everyone else feels the same way) is that Elin Woods went after her husband with - no surprise again - a golf club. "Sources" claim that Woods was texting one of his "transgressions" right in his house and his wife bagged him. And now one of those transgressions has turned over an alleged voice mail from Tiger Woods begging her to remove her name from her phone because his wife was probably going to call her and - no surprise - rip her a new you know what. Or something like that.
Remember the movie Moonstruck? Cher, Nicholas Cage, Danny Aiello and Olympia Dukakis? Olympia played Cher's mother in the movie and she caught her husband cheating on her. And she set out to find out why men cheat. The living room scene where Olympia and Danny Aiello (who plays Johnny - Nicholas Cage's brother who can't do wrong to his mother) are sitting plays out something like this:
Olympia: Lemme ask you something Johnny. Why do men cheat?
Danny Aiello: Because they fear death.
I always thought that was hysterical because Olympia Dukakis agreed and she goes on to tell her husband that he's gonna die anyways so he needs to 'stop seeing that woman.'
If only it were that simple.
People cheat for different reasons. But when celebrities cheat, the entire world knows about it because of who they are. The media creates a firestorm and when celebrities like Tiger Woods admit to "transgressions" but don't outright admit the actual cheating and with whom, the media continues to whip its audience into a frenzy with speculations and of course, the "cheat-ees" who eventually surface with all the damaging evidence.
Cheating has nothing to do with death. It's a means to bolster one's ego, one's self-esteem because there is always someone else who will look at you in a different light (maybe not a very good light but a different one at best) and who will compliment you or tell you things that your husband or wife or girlfriend or boyfriend has failed to see or simply overlooked, who will treat you differently than everyone and who will at some point in time become your go-to when the world is closing in around you.
When you are a celebrity, everyone wants a piece of you in some way, shape or form. It's whether you are willing to give yourself up to that kind of life - or to those "transgressions" in order to retain your self-esteem, self-worth or integrity.
What is it with famous people or people with money that make them commit acts of infidelity and then have their lives plastered on the front pages of every tabloid, every online magazine and dot com news center? Is there really something lacking in their lives that they can actually find with someone who has nothing to do with their lives?
Perhaps THAT is the answer. Perhaps celebrities should have boyfriends or girlfriends not in the "business" - people who live in obscurity, single Moms or Dads who don't have money but who actually have integrity and character and self-worth and values. Perhaps those qualities are what celebrities are seeking out when they commit these "transgressions."
I'm not a believer in the grass is always greener in the other side. Whether you are a celebrity with that "I don't give a fuck attitude" or someone like me who does live in obscurity, is not famous in any way, shape or form but has committed my own share of transgressions in my life that really are of no interest to anyone and certainly not worth tabloid fodder, it's how strong a person is on the inside, or how strong his or her own self-esteem and self-worth really is that can determine how you deal with stardom or fame or having gobs of money at your disposal.
If you become successful and/or become extraordinarily good at a natural talent with which you were born, it's up to you how you pursue that talent and how you handle the notoriety that comes with it.
But don't think that you need to have everyone love you or fall all over you to make you any better than who you are. I know there are people that live for that kind of adoration and those tabloids and online dot coms fuel the fire of transgressions - whether sexual or not - day after day and those people live for that kind of fame.
But sooner or later the furor dies down and those people fade out of print until someone else comes along with new transgressions and new fuel for the fire.
Is it really worth it in the end? And if you have children, is it worth it for them to be subjected to these transgressions as well?
Tiger Woods' kids are gonna grow up and find out that their Daddy was a cheater (not on the golf course) and that their Mom went after him with a golf club as a result. Nice job, Woods. Thank you for probably contributing to the delinquency of minors of the future - your own kids.
And ditto for Monica Lewinsky. I can't imagine her having children because sooner or later her kid(s) would find out what she did and be the subject of ridicule. And I'm not inclined to think that a kid will want his Mom at his baseball game who is known as the Mom who once gave a blow job to a president of the United States, among other things.
Every kid has their limits. Perhaps celebrities should find those limits too.
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